About Me~

Ping-Ponging~

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Someone once asked me kind of a scary question . I was actually really , really afraid to answer it. I am a really honest person , so when people ask me things, they get , “The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me , God.” Which in some ways is nice, if you’re my friend you get my unvarnished opinion. I mean , if you say , “Does this make my butt look big,” and it does, then be prepared to be offended, if you didn’t REALLY wanna’ know, ya’ know? But it has it ‘s drawbacks, not everyone really wants to know the truth , I guess, cause the truth they say sets you free, and I’m not sure some people want to be. But anyhow , sidetrack, sorry. Back to THE QUESTION. The person wanted to know what was it like inside my mind? Now that’s a rather personal question, no matter who it comes from, but it came from a small child, who I think was kind of wondering WHY I wrote all the time, and read all the time, two things I’m kind of , no , I take that back , seriously obsessed with. So since a little kid asked , ( happened to be my own little kid at that) I answered honestly. I told them, something I had only told one other person ever before. My brain never shuts off. EVER. Not even when I sleep. The ideas just go round, round , round and round. Stories, poems, people, places, words, dreams, past, present, future, together, apart, singles, doubles, ping-ponging their way to places unknown. Most of it I remember when I wake up and am just too exhausted to write it all down. If it’s poetry I try to. Some of the stories if they’re especially interesting. It’s always been this way. I don’t remember ever sleeping like people talk about sleeping. No, I go places. I guess the only time I can remember my brain ever being quiet to be perfectly honest is while under anesthesia for surgery. 24/7 365 all the time of my life I’ve remembered it being this way. Is it exhausting? Absolutely. Would I change it? I don’t know. It scares me either way. If I made it go away, would the poetry , writing, creative part, be gone? Could I string a sentence together? What would be the price to pay for ONE night of dreamless sleep, and could I, would I pay it?

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2 thoughts on “Ping-Ponging~”

    1. No, I don’t think I would either. It’s kind of a weird thing because my husband says he never dreams and asks me how do I stand it?!? I don’t really know. I guess I’ve done it for so long if my head were empty I think I might really , truly freak out, as if the radio had gone dead. So , I think I’ll keep things as they are.

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