The Troll’s Den~

It’s been so long since I’ve been here! Hullo again everyone! Hope you are enjoying a fabulous day wherever you are, and whatever you are doing. I’ve had some ups, and some downs. But the same is said for everyone, so that’s not news. Right now they think I might have torn my ACL or my Meniscus , and I am waiting on an MRI to tell, so I am seriously sofa-stuck. As in , way more than usual. I am trying to catch up on my writing, be more inspired, which is sometimes hard when you want to just be growl-y with the world at large. My boys coming up soon to be 17 and 15 HAVE actually been a huge help , they’ve been cooking dinner, doing laundry, running to the store ( well , not literally! driving, okay, driving! that’s a Southern term. “Will you run to the store?” ) , and of course they’ve also been keeping up with their studies , lest people think I use them as my personal servants, okay?!? That SO does not happen. But they live here too, and DUDE. Can they eat. As my Daddy says they have “holler legs”. It is not a lie. I swear I keep the local store in business on what they put away. And they aren’t overweight. If I ate like that , I’d weigh 400 pounds, not even kidding.  But they ARE teenage boys. They want to play their video games, aren’t really all that concerned with what girls think of them yet, ( Praise be to the Heavens!) , mostly just want to belch , scratch their armpits, and eat pizza.  So they are trolls. There. I said  it. Hey . You KNOW you were already thinking it, but a teenage boy at that stage is basically , a troll. So , after seeing all these stupid Febreze commercials, I decided I had to write about my feelings on the matter. I give you for your reading pleasure,

Dear Febreze~ Please stop making commercials that have my teenage sons believing that if they simply spray your product that their room will magically be clean. Teenage boys as a rule are untidy as a species. They do not like to live in organized environments and will happily enjoy as much chaos as will be allowed by whomever is in control of them . This soon descends into troll-like behavior , with the hoarding of objects; such as food, toys, games, electronics, some with a purpose and some no longer even with any wires! laundry of all sorts, the clean as of now not tellable from the unclean, objects totally unspeakable growing in spots you might even consider needing sprinkled with holy water. Instead, you would have them believe that for the low, low price of JUST $2.99! they can spray their room with your can of Harvest Fall Pumpkin Spice Pie and that will whisk away their troubles! I say unto you in the immortal words of the late comic John Pinette. Nay, Nay! What I get instead is a cloud of choking carcinogens that only mingle with body odor, dust, funky laundry, and what I can only assume is the pizza they carried in there sometime in the last milennia. You have lied Febreze, and I call you out on it. I dare you , I say, dare you to come to a room filled with teenage boys who have been using your product in the prescribed manner, and do a commercial. You will owe me money good sirs. On a final note, let me just say, your cans look really pretty on the shelf, which is about as much good as they do. Sincerely, a mother of two sons ( Whom I rabidly make clean their room every day, it just doesn’t seem to make much difference.)




What malodorous substance do you use,

to cover the lies you tell?

Do you not even notice now, 

the way it  gives off a smell?

It corrupts  everything you touch,

it poisons  the very air.

Wilts away  all the  new life, 

til only  the   old is there.

Friends once caught in conversation,

 can now only hear burnt words.

 Only falsely spoken cries from

fallen dying birds.

I want so badly  to believe again,

 that the words you say are  true,

in this apocalyptic wasteland, though, 

the most distorted thing  is you.

Ruby Jeanette Woods

August 2015



I love words. I have loved the sound of words , and  the human voice ever  since I can remember. My Daddy’s voice telling me things , teaching me the way of the world, while he held me in his big strong hands, is absolutely one of my first memories. My next oldest sister to me, is four  years older . She loved to play school. And I ,being the baby, was her student. ( Whether I liked it or not, ha!) I was 3 years old and she taught me to read.


I do not remember a time in my life when I did not know how to read, or when I did not love the written word.  I suppose it follows then, that I love languages , of all sorts, because I think it’s true what they say , “There AREN’T enough words in the English language to describe how I feel right now!”  It’s funny ,I was just thinking about that this morning, when I found this online .  These are foreign words and I think they are really beautiful. Whether or not they’ll come in handy, I don’t know, but it might be fun to spring them on someone in everyday conversation! Here’s to lovely words. May we never lose our hunger to learn them.

P.S.  Here is another beautiful word . Petrichor . It means the smell of the earth before the rain comes. Coming from the Latin Petra, meaning rock. And Ichor, meaning blood. So , literally,  the blood of the rock. Very fitting , because what you smell is quite literally the ions in the water of the earth and rocks being drawn from them before the rain comes.

Soak Up the Sun~

Hubs and I just got back from a mini trip over Friday and Saturday. We had a little stay-cation. We went for a drive up through the area called the Talimena Scenic Byway. It goes up to the second highest peak in Arkansas, Queen Wilhelmina Mountain  and has lots of beautiful places to stop and take pictures along the way.  We stopped at an old pioneer cemetery, did the scenic drive , and then stayed in the hotel where we went  for our honeymoon. Then we had breakfast at the Lux Cafe where we shared our very first breakfast as husband and wife. It was early yet , so we decided we’d hit a few garage sales,  and then went to our favorite flea market. We love to do that kind of thing , because you don’t have to spend a ton of money, but there’s always a lot of neat stuff. I honestly have to say, we’re kind of a weird couple , to be so young.  We like odd junk. We live in an old house, we collect oil lamps. I have an almost fetish for vintage hardback books. I wear dresses from the 50s , 60s and 70s, and think that retro vehicles are just the bees knees. We listen to the golden oldies, and our kids are the same. Their idea of a good time  is to fill the car up with gas and go “riding around” looking for old cars, or junk shops.  So yeah. Our weekend together is the best time the hubs and I have had in a really , really long time. Thought you guys might like to see some of the pictures we took. These are just a handful of them.  If you want to visit some place really beautiful , check out Queen Wilehelmina Mountain , the town of Mena, Arkansas, and the Talimena Scenic Byway .

yellowdaisies2015 orangebutterfly2015 whitelunarmoth2015 blackeyedsusan2015 yellowbutterflyongreenplant

MultiColored Butterlfy
MultiColored Butterlfy


Eagle Look out Vista
Eagle Look out Vista
Fencing implement
Fencing implement
Bakers Elk
Bakers Elk
Seventh Seal
Seventh Seal
Old Horton's Plumbing Sign Glenwood , Arkansas
Old Horton’s Plumbing Sign Glenwood , Arkansas

In a Digital World~



It’s good to be back here at my WordPress post.  It’s been a couple of months since I’ve written anything here. Not since I’ve written anything  , PERIOD, as I can’t go a day without somehow sharing my thoughts to paper. Hubs was on vacay this last week, and we had a really awesome time together. We didn’t really go do a ton of stuff, in large part because he works so hard the rest of the time, that when he does get a week off, he just wants to rest!

While we were out riding around ( something people do for kicks here) , we saw a gorgeous rainbow. I mean,  a – Technicolor-you couldn’t have computer-generated-it – bright, rainbow. We have had a lot of rain here , with flooding , and so on, and that particular evening it drizzled while the sun was shining, in just the right way to produce that dazzling show.  I saw where some people had seen the rainbow , and taken pictures of course, and posted them to FaceBook. Which is awesome. I have nothing against FaceBook or taking pictures and posting them there, for sure.  But a funny thought occurred to me. These days it almost seems as if people feel compelled to think “If I don’t get a picture of that on FaceBook, folks will never believe it happened!!”  Well, I DIDN’T get a photograph , and I promise you, it really DID happen.  Hubs and I went out to eat a few times while the kids were gone to camp, and it just blew my mind how so many people have their phones out at the tables , just a ‘textin’ away, or doing whatever one does on those mini-computers that they tote.  It seems as if they are permanently attached to everyone’s hands these days.  No one even looks anyone else in the eye while they are eating, it’s “Shovel, shovel, thumbs ‘a’flyin’ , talking to the digital person when there’s a GENUINE , in the flesh person at the dinner table with them.  I am really NOT that old, (36) and I can remember when  you ate and made CONVERSATION. ( shock and horror, I know!)   :)    And people made memories all the time . No one had an iPhone to capture them. So does that mean they didn’t really happen?  Of course not.  All this digital stuff is great , to a point.  But it’s just floating around in the ether somewhere.  We need to remember that the things that really matter are the PEOPLE, the memories themselves.  Something you will have long after that crazy , ball -and-chain-phone is a memory all its own.  :)

Where Ya’ll From ?


I just got reminded of something recently . Haven’t thought about it in a while , but some things that got said on the wild and wacky world of FaceBook made me recall it.  Apparently, I have an accent. A Southern one. HA! :) The conversation had started over one of those quizzes that people take on FB. You know the ones I mean; Which color are you?  Can we guess your home state? What magical creature are you? and on it goes.  Well, they had this quiz on there , “Can you translate these southern sayings?” .  So. I’m just going to come right out and say it. I don’t know what people they were talking to but it was NOT anybody from anywhere near the South. I seriously had NEVER heard any of the things they had listed , and don’t know of anyone who has. So in the interest of telling it like it is, let me share with you some true deep South sayin’s.

1. More nervous than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rockin’ chairs.

(You’re pretty nervous.)

2. That fence\house\wall is cattywhomped.

(It’s crooked. )

3. Those two just do not geehaw with one another.

(When a team of animals are taught to pull gee is the command to go left and haw the command to go right, they have to work together to accomplish their task, so this saying means ”They don’t get along.”)

4. Ugly as homemade soap.

(You’re in a bad way ugly)

Somebody whooped you with an ugly stick. ( Same thing)

5. I’m feelin’ so poorly, I’d have to get better to die.

(You’re pretty sick.)

6. His bread’s in the oven , but the gas ain’t on.

Dumber than a bag of hammers.

(Both ways of saying of saying someone is very dumb.)

7. Drunker than Cooter Brown.

(Although I have heard this expression from lots of people I never have learned who Cooter was or why he was so drunk.)

8. Don’t mollycoddle that kid.

(You’re spoiling them, and letting them get away with way too much.)

9, The Good Lord willin’ and the creek don’t rise.

(Meaning , if it’s supposed to happen it will.)

10. You’re payin’ for your raisin’.

( Your child is just like you, and now you are regretting being such a brat to your parents. )

And so on it goes.  So there’s a taste of something real.  I mean , after all , real Southern accents are made by sweet tea sippin’ , front porch sittin’, magnolia bloomin’, swingin’ slow, muggy hot summers.  I suppose maybe those quiz people were just doing the best they could , “Bless their little ole hearts. ”    :D

It Was In the Air~

It’s been one of those days . Where everything has sucked. It has sucked from start to finish and I am not afraid to say it.  I have a good friend , she swears I know when something bad is going to happen, a kind of sixth sense if you will. First off let me say , I had to go to the rheumatologist, which is NEVER the way I want my day to begin , or a good start ,  so I know I was expecting that, but it all went down hill from there. I went, the  doctor didn’t listen to a THING I said. She wanted to put me on medication I didn’t need. She wanted to send me to a doctor I don’t have to have. She overrode my every decision. She talked over me. She treated me like a moron. THEN they screwed up my medications. I had to go back. They said they fixed it. They didn’t . I went back again. They FINALLY fixed it.  We went to get something to eat . They screwed my order up. I told my mother , “There is something seriously wrong with this day. IT’s IN THE AIR.” I’d been on edge all day. I hadn’t been home 10 minutes when I got the call from my mom that my uncle (one whom I had been very close to) had passed away. It wasn’t necessarily a surprise, he’s been ill a really long time. But it still is painful. He was the only other person who called me Pea, like his Dad, my Poppaw Capps. We gardened together, and just generally what we say here in the South, “Gave each other a bad time.” which is shorthand for “We loved each other.” When I was little he would call the house , and say, “Hey Pea. ” and I would immediately know who it was, and he would talk to me for a bit before he would talk to Momma.  We would sit on the back of the old Falcon and eat a cheeseburger from Ms. Jo Couch’s grocery , with me swingin’ my bare feet off the tailgate. He of course would be drinking beer, and smoking, two things he made me PROMISE I would never do , because, “Pea, it’s real bad for you, and you don’t never need to take that up.”  I promised, and I never have. I remembered.

My family is partly Native American and my uncle was very dark with very black hair , and when he moved to California he worked in a factory . Of course there are a lot of Hispanics and Latinos there and they just assumed that’s what my  uncle was. He was the oldest man working , so they called him Papi or the ‘old man’ and really respected him.

He came back home , ( well, I say home, MY home, anyhow) in 2000 when PopPaw died . Between his health , and mine , we never got a chance to see each other in person again, although we talked.

I know he’s alright now, so I’ll be alright too. But it’s still a sucky day, you know?

Go rest high, Uncle George. I ‘ll see ya’ later. ~ Pea



My husband took me out for a drive up around the lake that’s about 7 miles from where we live yesterday. They call Arkansas the Natural State for good reason. If you live here, there is pretty much a lake, stream , river, pond, or body of water of some sort near driving distance from where you live. People hunt here, they fish, there are more critters of the furry , scaled, flying, and feathered variety than you could shake a stick at. We have huge loblolly pines, cedars, oaks, practically any kind of tree you could imagine. I love it here.

During my childhood I spent more time outdoors than I EVER spent in. I was a wildling. I hated bathing, combing my hair only when made to, did not wear shoes, rode a horse everywhere , went without a shirt  , dressed as a boy; people thought my Dad had three daughters and ONE son, and he most of the time did not bother to correct them.  Two of my favorite things , other than riding, were to climb the tallest tree I could find, and the other, were to go up what we called ‘ the dirt road’  and lay in Mr. Plant’s pasture for hours and just watch the clouds go by overhead. There is something so amazing about just feeling the grass under your back, and smelling the trees, and not having to worry about a single thing.

Then I lost all that. Some crazy illness from the pit of wherever these things come from stole that from me. The very sunshine itself made me sick. I couldn’t even get out in it. It were as if I became a vampire. A pale shadow of myself. Smelling the grass made me break out into hives. Pine trees made me come down with infections so severe I ‘d need antibiotics.  Heck. I couldn’t even climb a tree without becoming so winded I ‘d feel like passing out. The fatigue was unbelievable.

Fast forward 15 plus years to yesterday and the ride round the lake I was telling you about. I have lupus and assorted other things . We know that now. I deal. The thing is,  I have bad spells . I get really sick, so I hadn’t been out , not really ,in so very long, because the problem I’ve been dealing with lately is what they call syncope. That’s a fancy word for passing out. Kissing the carpet.  Not fun. No drives. Heh. Shoot. No sitting up for very long without feeling light headed. But I’ve felt better the last couple of weeks so up to the lake we went.  It was spectacular. Everything was greener than I have ever seen it. Suddenly a tear leaked out of the corner of my eye. The minute it does my husband starts to pull the car over thinking I’m getting sick. ” What’s wrong? Are you okay?!?” he asked nervously.  “Yeah. Yes. Yes. It’s  just so beautiful.”